A bit of a tongue in cheek title, I know. This post is what I call serious sarcasm. Nobody is perfect; that is for sure! But, it is important to remember that manners and self-awareness are largely controlled by the individual. My new podcast begins in July and this will be a frequent topic of conversation. Teaching kids manners early is so very important. Enjoy…
Photo by the very talented Caleb Ruckel (see his Flickr link below)
My family and I have been visiting Disney World about 1.5 times per year since 2004. One of the best decisions we ever made was purchasing the Disney Vacation Club (DVC) with a chunk of the gift money we received from our wedding in 2005. Tons of great memories. I have become a (self-proclaimed) Disney nerd.
We’ve visited The World during the busiest and slowest times of the year. Regardless of the crowd size, the same problems seem to creep up each time we go. So, I’ve decided to share our invented vocabulary that will help keep you in the good graces of the polite police while visiting Disney (or any other crowded place on the planet, for that matter).
Wangling is the most annoying “art” of walking at an angle. While the flow of traffic around you is heading in a common direction refrain from dissecting that flow by arbitrarily walking at an angle. This act cuts off everyone beside you and behind you. Anti-polite! Use the old driving technique of looking over your shoulder before merging and saying words like “excuse me” or “pardon me.” A more advanced version is the zig-zag wangler…aye, aye, aye.
Like wangling, this is a combination of words (middle and stopping), and is perhaps the most annoying and disruptive behavior of all. Don’t ever, ever stop in the middle of the walk way. We get it, you need to find the Rockin’ Roller Coaster or the next start time of Flights of Wonder. Or maybe Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum are signing autographs in New Fantasyland and you want to take a peek. We don’t want you to miss these great attractions, but mopping can cause a rear-end pile up or force others around you to wangle. Check your blind spot, don’t wangle and pull over. By the way, this also applies in the grocery store, at work, or any other place where other people exist.
Or family barricade…This occurs when your party of 14 is on Main Street walking side by side at .2 miles per hour. Please, enjoy the experience, the weather, and the magic. Just don’t enjoy it by blocking the entire walk way. Stagger your party so others aren’t forced to walk into oncoming traffic or wangle. You never know! Someone may be trying to make their FastPass time at Space Mountain. Familycade wangling or mopping are most egregious.
Like texting and driving, this is a most dangerous activity. We appreciate that you aren’t mopping. Thank you. But the readwalker will only cause one to wangle and, inevitably walk into oncoming traffic, a flower bed, or The Beast trying to get to his next autograph session in France at the World Showcase. For pure entertainment purposes, when a readwalker approaches, I simply stop until they run into me. The entertaining part is when the offender is surprised and startled that they walked into someone.
These are the four biggies. Honorable mentions go to 1) Walking on the wrong side of the “road” 2) Making out in line 3) Picking your nose 4)Leaving dirty diapers on the bus 5) Wiping snot off your nose with your hand and then touching the queue rails 6) Running into someone’s Achilles tendon with your moterized buggy and 7) Farting while on the Tower of Terror. All of which have happened to me.
UPDATE: A newer version of readwalking is PHALKING. Yes, phalking. Phoning/texting while walking. Seriously, people, if you have to text pull over and do it and stop running into people. I tell my son all of the time, saying you’re sorry 100 times for doing the same thing doesn’t count as being polite. That goes for you, too…phalkers (smh).
The bottom line? All of this is solved if adults learn and teach their children to always be aware of their surroundings and remain polite and cognizant of that awareness. Just a little life lesson from the desk of Jim Ellis.
For more great photos by Caleb Ruckel click here!